Expectations

I often wonder about expectations. People work around with plans of weddings, engagements, dream guys and girls, proposals etc. I think this points out with with optimistic dispositions. People who plan for their futures. When I hear such plans, i often wonder how these people can afford to be that optimistic about life and the future. No one knows what tomorrow holds. It could just be one disappointment after the other, but still they hope.

I am truly amazed.

I have tried sometimes to see life through those rose tinted glasses but it always ends with me being disappointed. In myself and in the people involved in my experiment.

A friend just described her dream wedding and it was something out of Disneyland. I couldn't help but laugh and ask severally if she realized it sounded like a Cinderella story? I guess different things help people get by daily. It might be the thrill of a first kiss or the excitement of your upcoming wedding or the hopes of holding your newborn after minimal labor (dreams). The ability to dream they say has a power that can transform and bring into being that which we mostly desire. I just haven't been able to master that act.

I dream of having a successful marriage, business (even if i don't know what that would be), responsible children and lots of money. But to have elaborate dreams of how this will materialize is something else all together. I don't dream of my dress, my wedding day, the wedding colors, food, music and all the things ladies bother themselves with when wedding bells chime and for that I am laughed at/mocked. I don't believe in the razzmatazz of it all and i won't apologise for that.

Expectations. It can be your undoing, if not managed. I don't expect much, just to be happy with my life my family, be content with what God has in store for my future, have enough to cater for my immediate and external family and meet all my financial and otherwise obligations, be a good mother and wife. The expression / manifestations of these are what I can't tell but I know the future IS good.

Pessimist or not, I do hope for the best and believe that the best indeed is yet to come. Even though it might not seem as such right now, the future is good.